Are You Living in the Past?
Do you spend too much time living in the glorious memories of the past?
What about those unpleasant thoughts of the past, do they sometimes consume you?
Thinking thoughts about the past aren’t necessarily bad until it becomes so…
The environment you were raised in encouraged such a habit. Did you overhear adult conversations where memories were shared about days of old either glorifying them or ruminating about the bad things that happened?
There can be an inherited predisposition to depression and other tendencies that contribute to your past-dwelling.
Is Living In the Past a Habit?
Adopted the habit of living in the past as a coping mechanism to avoid living in the present?
Possibly, low self-esteem and the unconscious belief that “you don’t deserve to be happy,” contributes to your tendency to self-sabotage your happiness.
There is a difference between thinking about the past and living in it. It’s easy to live what we know best, whether it’s living in the past glory happy days, or living in the unpleasantness of the past. Some of us can’t seem to escape the “grips” of the past and the impact it has had on our lives.
Ask yourself these questions:
- Is there one period from the past that you find yourself clinging on to?
- Do you feel that you will never reach that level of happiness-status-satisfaction-acceptance etc. ever again?
- Are you frustrated with where you currently are in life?
- Are you fearful of the future?
- Does thinking about the past make you sad?
Clinging to the past because you don’t feel there is anything in the present or future that could be better, and if thinking about the past in that way makes you sad, you may be stuck in the past.
Why is this a problem?
It robs you of the opportunity to enjoy the present. If you aren’t happy where you are now in life, living in the past won’t help!
What are you avoiding?
It is a false belief that dwelling on the past can give you control over the chaos or prevent bad things from happening in life. What happens is, we take solace in our misery. Misery is certain, misery can be controlled, and misery is familiar.
This pattern of misery is a distraction from the present moment; from the emptiness in your life, from your fear of living courageously, from your fear of failure, from your fear of being responsible for the outcome of your actions.
Living in the past can give us a key to avoiding self-responsibility in the present. It is the highest form of avoidance.
If you would like to break free from living in the past, dwelling on things you cannot control or break inherited patterns, I can help.
Sign up for one of my private, one-on-one, virtual clearings and break free from your past, finally. Sign up here.